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Tipaphobic


I have a mom (didja know that? That I had a mom? Shocker, huh?)...so, anywho...this mom of mine, she is a tip junkie.

A tip-aholic.



It's a little ridiculous, really.


I mean, I think she spends more on her vacations just tipping people, than she does on anything else (admit it mom...it's soooo true?!!!)...she tips everyone from the taxi driver to the stranger sharing her cab...from the door man to the people on vacation with her.

Seriously, I wouldn't doubt if she tipped her doctor after a pap smear.

Well, okay...that's takin' it a little far.

But, her excessive, random tippingness, has turned me into a tip-aphobe!!

It's true...I am now obsessed with who(m?) y
ou do and/or don't tip.

I once had the carpet cleaner scheduled to come clean our carpets (imagine that!! A carpet cleaner cleaning carpets!! Geepers,
have you ever heard of such a thing? Why I never...)

So, anywho...the carpet dude comes driving down the driveway...and I panic...I pick up the phone, speed dial my mama, and whisper (whisper, 'cuz you know, Carpet Dude likely has bionic ears and can hear me, all the way out there in his van...), "Mom...do I tip the Carpet Dude?!!!!!"

Her response? "Um, no. I don't think you have to tip the Carpet Dude."


Really??!!! Well, I bet if we were on vacation we'd tip the Carpet Dude! I was shocked.

And relieved.

But confused.

I mean, if you don't tip the Carpet Dude, then who do you tip?

So, anyway...I have become tipaphobic. I don't know who to tip or what to tip or how much to tip or when to tip.

It's a curse.

It's all consuming.

But...but!!! There is one thing I know for certain...I don't tip fast food joints.

I mean, c'mon!!!

Even McDonald's doesn't do tips!

I went through a drive thru today (and, for real...what doesn't scream fast food, than a drive thru?!!)...and, the dude hands me a slip to "sign", with a spot for a tip.

Really?

Does this mean that I hafta start tipping the cashiers at the grocery stores?

Or, perhaps the dental hygienist when I get my teeth cleaned? (Oh, gosh...wait...are you supposed to tip the hygienist? Oh, man!!! Another one to worry about...better call my mom...)

Am I totally off base to think it's wrong that fast food joints are now asking for tips? I saw him look at it, too...he was all, "Hmmmm...did she tip me?"

Gosh...they probably spit in my food. "Stupid non-tipper girl...'Hock a loogey in that order, Bob...we got ourselves a non-tipper!'..."

Ugh.

What's a girl to do?

I need a book...a "Tipping Etiquette" book...do they make those?

And where can I buy one?


Yours truly,


Comments

  1. I'm big on tipping as well. If you've had a job before like bar tending where you make your money off of tips, you realize you should tip wherener you can. That's why I've always been big on tipping. I figure I'll get better service for tipping well too.

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  2. Oh gosh! You had me rolling! And now you've got me thinking about all the places I maybe should have tipped. So how much do you tip a barber? I only tipped him $5 but he cut both of my boy's hair. As I was leaving I wondered if I should have tipped more since there were 2 hair cuts. Gosh.. you've really got me thinking now. Thanks a lot! LoL!!

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  3. I also am big on the tipping thing. I once was a bar tender as well as a server and you definitely learn what tipping is when you work a job like that. It even taught my hubby to tip well. My MIL, on the other hand has also worked as a server and I get a little annoyed that she doesn't tip all that well here (she lives in a small town where ppl don't tip well AT ALL!). What about Sonic, though? Is that the one exception to tipping at a fast food joint? Think about it... then let me know what you think because I don't know! LOL!

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  4. I worked in the bar industry for 10 years and I can NOT STAND when someone doesn't tip... Or tips really crappy, if you are going to tip so crappy just do not even bother!
    As for fast food...
    Um, NO! No tip from me...
    But, I do tip when I get to go orders...
    You know, they have other people to wait on and they are having to make sure to get your order, make sure it is right...
    So, it is basically a table without the mess and the time sitting there..

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  5. i tip well at restaurants, but i also tipped our maid on our vacation recently... why? well, i used to work as a maid & it always made my day to get a tip! BUT - i worked on commission & got 30% of the job which wasn't a whole lotta money. I don't know it works like that for hotel clerks, ya know? I tip at hair salons, too, though & i'm not sure WHY - i mean, they make pretty good money, right?!

    Oh, it's all so confusing! But i am SURE there is a book on it somewhere! :)

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  6. We are a money hungry country. It's sick really. I tip in 2 places.

    1) The commissary. The baggers work for tips only AND they walk to my car in rain, cold, 100+ DEGREE SUMMER DAYS, deal with my screaming kids and put my groceries in my car. It's the least I could do for them.

    2) Restaraunts. Barring the service is good...

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  7. You are Miss Obvious tonight-having a mom, carpet guy cleaning carpets... :) Cracked up at the pap smear comment! hahaha!

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  8. Re: fast food and similar, it's like "Why am I supposed to tip you if there is no table service here? Because you took my money and you're promising to let me come get my own food in a few minutes?"

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  9. That's unbelievable! I mean seriously tipping a fast food restaurant!!!! I once was at a little family restaurant and seriously had no tip money. That waiter has given me the evil eye ever since(He still works there!) Yeah, not even kidding...My mom even sees it. lol

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  10. LOL...I would not tip the carpet dude. Nope...not doing it. I wouldn't tip the roofer, the baker or the candlestick maker. I tip a waiter or waitress, hairdresser...that's it. I can't think of anyone else...OH..pizza dude. I know on vacation you may tip the maid and junk. Maybe I'm not posh enough to have a list of those I tip. lol.

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  11. Ok so I'm not a big tip person,
    & I have never gave the cleaning man a tip, (thats so funny)

    But I do think its great your mom is like that,I dislike those people who never tip,

    love your blog,you r funny!

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  12. I'm big on tipping as well, just not quite so many different people as your mom might! I believe in tipping well for good service. I think it comes from having been a server! :) I love this post, btw ...

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  13. if you ever find that book let us know. i have another tip question. we live on a military post and if you shop the commisary (grocery store) then there are baggers (it is a big no no to bag your own groceries). but there are signs everywhere that say BAGGERS WORK FOR TIPS ONLY. they also take your groceries to your car. so what do u tip them. i have to be honest i tip the old people more than the young. but really i would love to know what they make a hour. if i give them $5 on a busy day it takes them maybe 10 minutes if i have 2 carts full. any suggestions

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  14. I think the whole tipping thing has gotten way out of hand!!! Everywhere I go there is a tip jar and I don't feel like I should have to tip everyone. The chinese food when I go pick it up??? The pizza guy when I now have to pay for delivery?? That one really ticks me off, why are we now paying for delivery and still have to tip??? Hairdressers, I pay crazy amounts to get my hair done and now I have to tip her too??? I do tip and I tip well but I do not think I should in a lot of situations. No one tipped me when I was a daycare provider taking care of everyone's kids!! I didn't expect it so why does everyone else???

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  15. You said tips and I thought "words of wisdom" - haha... money is always better!

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  16. Personally I think the practice should be done away with altogether. Businesses should pay their people what they are worth. If that means a restaurant needs to go up on the price by 15% then go up on your prices. If hairdressers have to cgo up on their prices, so be it. I will shop around and find one in my price range. Why can one restaurant afford to pay it's employees full price and serve quality food at a good price and another can't? Why should I subsidize them not paying their employees what they are worth? If they find that employee A works really hard and brings in the customers, take her in the front office, raise her pay by .75 an hour, pat her on the back and tell her to keep it to her self. If employee B is rude to the customers, send him packing. Why should I, as the customer be responsible for your hiring practices?

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  17. Was it a Sonic? All their reciepts have the tip spot, even though you aren't supposed to tip the drive-thru. Just a thought...

    I am at a loss for tipping outside of the normal (restaurants, hair etc). We just moved into our house and now I have to wonder about the garbage men, mail man etc.

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  18. I am all for tipping at restaurants although I agree with above commenter - they should pay them well enough where it isn't necessary. The 2 places I don't get - Starbucks - they are no different than a fast food - I don't see why a tip jar is necessary. #2 MY hairdresser - she OWNS the place - but I still do and I tip her well.

    ReplyDelete

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