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I am a Photoshop Flunkie.

I need help.

I need a transfusion of braincells. Anyone willing to donate?

I've always said that a woman loses 25% of her braincells with the conception, gestating, and birth of each child. So...let's do a little math equation...

Me + 5 children - 25% of braincells x 5 = erm...ahh...well, I can't figger it out. I've got nuthin' left up there!

I downloaded the "fully functioning" trial version of Photoshop last night. I eagerly anticipated it's installation and watched that little blue bar get bigger and bigger and the time tick down.

Then, I opened it.

And, already I was stumped. I couldn't figure out how to open a photo!!

Oh, fer Pete's sake!! (Um..."place"???? How 'bout "add" or "open" or "click here to upload a photo"???'s "place". Dumb.)

I tried three times. I failed miserably twice...and came up with this on the third:
(can someone tell me why this photo look so wonky? It doesn't look "rough" like this in Photoshop...)
And, the before:
Oooooh, big difference huh? Wow. I feel tho thmart.

I need to go back to Picnik for a little self-esteem boost. And, I need some chocolate. And, maybe a glass of wine.

(And someone to kindly take me through Photoshop Elements step. by. step. Please and thank you.)


  1. Hey if somebody helps you out please dont forget your long lost blonde over here ;) I think I am going to sit down with picnik and see what I can do tonight... over photoshop for a few days!

    Did you get my email this am? Just wanted to check. Hope you get some help and get ya a glass of wine. :)

  2. I like it when you go on a Picnik much better than this PS stuff. Let's call it PMS (Photo Malfunction Shop) The original was good, but I don't like what photoshop has done with it. I'd give you some braincells but 25% X 3 is 75% gone. Factor in what I have to use for basic motor skills, memory and coordination and I am operating at a 98% braincell deterioration. I got nuttin either.

  3. I have an ancient copy of PS7, but it sounds way different than Elements! It almost looks like a resolution issue, maybe?

  4. Mama M- try Lightroom- seriously you will not be disappointed! :-)
    I downloaded GIMP which is a little like Photoshop (except free) and honestly it seems like Greek to me- I then got the trial version of Lightroom 3 and LOVED it!!! I then bought the version 3 because it is so awesome. Without further sounding like an Adobe rep. (cuz I'm totally not!) I'll just stop now.'s easy and fun and gives me great results! :)

  5. Oh, and by the way, your before pic is GREAT!!

  6. wine? Your bestie is ALWAYS standing by with wine--I'll be there in a minute with wine if you can provide the chocolate?

    GRRRR at Photoshop. (that's me growling on your behalf--I'm sure Photoshop is now terrified)

  7. Grr, I loathe photoshop but have such a huge desire to master it. I've been working on invitations and just figured out the whole layer thing....
    It could be the way you are saving the photo that is making it come out wonky. When you save the file you have all the different options...jpeg, bmap etc....maybe try saving it as a different type of file.....that's just my very amateur opinion as I probably know less than you. I pretty much do all my photo editing on picnik too, lol

  8. I think there are actual courses you can take on how to use photoshop. Therefore, we should not feel bad if we can't figure it out without a degree in said program.

  9. I totally agree. Lightroom is wonderful. I myself use Photoshop Elements 8 and Lightroom together. I need to find another version of lightroom however, because my version is about to expire. :(

  10. I use PSE7 but I don't know a lot about it. I've been "playing" with it for about a year. I watch a lot of tutorials but still don't know as much as I'd like to. When I first got it I took a class to learn the basics about Photoshop. I wish there was an online class to learn Photoshop. Let us know if you find some help with it.

  11. what did you do DURING the edit? That would make it easier to help than just looking at the picture. Your before picture is actually really good. I probably would only boost contrast a teensy bit, perhaps saturation, and then do an unsharp mask (not sure they have that in PSE). This blog:
    is really good at explaining things in PSE and PS, and might be a good place to look at as far as honing some of your skills.

  12. I'd comment, but I already forgot the topic. Dang brain-stealin' kids.

  13. Hey hun,
    1. has excellent tutorials.
    2. PS isn't a simple piece of software. It takes a while just to learn the basics so don't feel bad at all.
    3. what looks good on my monitor may look contrasty and saturated on yours because every monitor "sees" color differently, so please don't make color corrections to your image based on what we tell you.
    4. Place? Really? I'm on CS4 at work and Open is still an option.
    5. there's many possible reasons why your image looks different (color-wise) now. one basic thing is PS has a Color Settings menu listed under Edit. This controls the way you view color and the way color information is applied to your images when saving. Go to this menu and change the Working Space RGB to sRGB (or sRGBIEC61966-2.1) then change the Color Management Policies to Convert to Working RGB. Uncheck the Profile Mismatches and Missing Profiles boxes. By doing this, what you and viewers see in Safari and Firefox should be similar to what you see in PS. IE doesn't care much for color.

    If you have any other Qs or if you'd like me to take a look at the files, feel free to email me.

  14. Haha! You sound just like me when I first started out with PS. :)

    Google for tutorials, it helped get me started. :)

  15. I hate PS! I really get lost in the layers, literally. I like Picnik and Paint and anywhere else that doesn't seem so scary.
    I think your before photo looks better than the after. Good luck girl!

  16. I tried using the Photoshop Elements free trial version too, and could NOT figure it out for the life of me!

    I use Creative Memories digital scrapbooking software called, "Memory Manager 3.0." It has all the basic photo editing features without getting to complicated.

    Great shot, she's adorable!

  17. Now that I see it on my monitor at work, I think it's just too compressed. Compare the file size (MB) of the new file versus the old file. If the old file is much bigger than the new file, there's a good chance that when you Saved as a jpeg, the JPEG Options was set to a low quality equaling small file size.

  18. I had the same problem when I tried. I checked out Photoshop Elements 8 for Dummies from the library. Then I learned that you tube has a lot of tutorials so check that too.

  19. Hi, I looked for help in many places: and have both been very helpful.

    Have a great day. xxx

  20. Feel free to pass on any tips to this dummy mommy!

  21. Take a class or use the tutorials on youtube. I've had Photoshop CS3 for a year, and still just know the basics!


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