Five Question Friday! 9/3/10

It's September.

How did that happen? I mean, like...really. HOW? I could have sworn that my kids just scrambled out of their last day of school in June, and now...they go back on Tuesday?

I WANT MY SUMMER VACATION BACK!!

Welcome to Five Question Friday...where you are privy to my weirdness, quirks, and declarations of my love for summer vacation. Sometimes, I think I am meant to homeschool. (Stacy...I can sense you picking up the phone to harrass me some more. It may be working. ;) )

If you've never played along with us before...we've missed you! This a the most fun (and easiest) blog hop around! Trust me. Easy peasy, lemon squeezy!

Alright...I'm currently propping my eyelids open with toothpicks, and it's really getting uncomfortable, so let's get this show on the road!

Rules for Five Question Friday: Copy and paste the following questions to your blog post, answer them, then watch for the linky post to appear on Friday morning, at which time you "linky up"! If you don't have a blog feel free to answer the questions in the comments!

Questions for Friday, September 3rd: (Special thanks to Colleen, Crissy, Bethany, Sandy, and Nel for their question suggestions! If YOU would like to be linked in a future 5QF, c'mon over to my community and offer up your best question suggestions!)

1. What do you do when you have time to yourself?

2. When you look out your kitchen window, what do you see?

3. Who/What would you want to be reincarnated as?

4. What is your biggest pet peeve about other people's kids?

5. Regular or Diet soda?

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1. What do you do when you have time to yourself?

Wait...can we back up just a second...back to that...that thing...what is this "time to yourself" business that you speak of?

I've never heard of such a thing. It's arcane. Ludacris. Why I...psh.

Fer silly.

However...if I was granted time to myself...I'd like to poop in private please. Without someone little joining me and asking, "You gotta go poop, mom?"

Er, yeah.

While I'm dreaming...I'd also like to eat a salad. At a restaurant. And not share. Not even one little crouton dipped in ranch dressing. Not. A. One.

Boy, this is fun...lemme keep going.

I'd like my very own "Campfire Mocha" from Caribou Coffee, please. One all to myself, with nary a teeny little sip shared with anyone.

Ditto an ice cold coke.

Sigh.

And to think...it won't be long, and I'll have all of that.

Guess I'll have plenty of time to enjoy myself later. Wait. Wrong. Alllllll wrong. Ahem (geepers, can you tell I'm tired? Punchy Mama comes out.)...what I meant was, I'll have plenty of time to myself to enjoy when my kids are grown.

But dang, that coffee would be nice...

2. When you look out your kitchen window, what do you see?

I spy, with my little eye, a crew of construction workers, their van full of "stuff" (I have to tell you...it's taken all the will power I have not to sneak a peek into that van! Weird, I know...), a ginormous dumpster full of our old roof.

And dead grass. With too much sun on it. Where a beautiful big oak tree once stood, then sat for too long, all hacked into firewood, and killed our grass.

Stupid grass.

Stupid tree.

3. Who/What would you want to be reincarnated as?

Now, now, now...please, nobody go and get yer undies in a bundle over this question. This is just for fun. F-U-N, fun!

I, if I were to comeback as something, would come back as a humpback whale. Ooooooh, how I love humpback whales! Ugly, yes, graceful, yes.

Once upon a time, I took a honeymoon with the most handsome man I know (and whom I miss very, very much...hurry home, hon!!! We miss you!) to the most gorgeous place on earth...Hawaii.

There was a teeny little glitch tho'. Don't judge...

Two weeks before our wedding, we found out we were expecting The Belle! (Oh, fer shame! A pregnancy out of wedlock-just barely-AND reincarnation?! Why I never...) I really got to know the hotel toilet really well.

It was nice and cool, so we got along just fine.

I did offer one up for the team, and went whale watching with my handsome groom. I was so excited...I've LOVED whales since I first saw Shamu leap out of the water at Sea World.

Captivated.

Awed.

In love.

So, I was very excited to go on this trip. Only thing is...I had morning sickness (that lasted all day) and to top it off, I'm a whimp, and I get motion sickness too.

I ended up spending the trip with a cold coke on my head, hanging my noggin' over the boat, fearful that a tiger shark was going to leap out of the water and decaptiate me and leave my husband a widower on his honeymoon. (Dramatic much?)

What I missed, was only the most spectacular display of whale action I'm sure to ever witness ever again in my life. They were SO active...jumping and breeching and playful and "spy hopping".

*sob!!!* I wanna go back!

Or, just be reincarnated as one.

4. What is your biggest pet peeve about other people's kids?

Uggity ugg. I can't HANDLE the whining!! (Come to think of it, I can't take it with my own kids, either.)

Makes me wanna gouge out my eyeballs when I hear whining. Especially, whiny talking...I can't even describe it, and I've just sat here for 31 hours racking my brain trying to put it into words.

Tell me you know what I'm talking about.

Even if you have no clue...just tell me you know all about "whiny talking".

5. Regular or Diet soda?

First things, first...NEL. It's pop. As in "I'll take my pop straight up please. Chemical free and loaded with sugar, thankyouverymuch." ;)

Okay, okay, okay...so, I'm trying to make the switch to saying "soda"...only it gets stuck halfway out and it sounds something like this..."What kind of *insert me trying to force "soda" out of my mouth* sOOOOOOOd'...pop do you have?"

And the server looks at me like I've got two heads, one male and one female, and says, "Oh, geepers, hon. Dontcha know we've got all sorts of pop? You betcha we do!"

So I order a straight up Coke.

Un-diet style.

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It's linky time!! Hope you had fun, and hope you survived my answers...like I said, I was a little punch-drunk tired!