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Oh What a Night!!

Last Friday started out good enough...I went to get my hair highlighted, which always makes my day...yeah, so, it was at the horrid hour of 8am, but nonetheless, I like to have someone play with my hair!

My mom and I then decided that we would make a trip to the mall to attempt some Christmas shopping. First mistake: shopping with children when you actually need to get something accomplished.

I purchased one thing...and my stress level was growing by the minute! The kids weren't horrible, they were just being "kids", but I could NOT, for the life of me, focus on what I needed to get done.

I had already declared the trip "worthless"...and that was before the ill-fated trip to Sam's Club.

The last straw: My children running around and around the racks...giggling because they thought I was chasing them (obviously they couldn't see my clenched jaw and the steam coming from my ears...). I finally caught them, loaded them into the cart, looked at my mom and said "I'm going."

What I really wanted to say was:
"I'm #^$^% @#$ totally %^& &^%$# stressing ^%$#$%^and I'm !@#$% *&^%$#@# going!!!!!!!!!!!"

But, I'm a mature, responsible I just said that in my head.

As I was pushing my children out in the cart, one who had removed her boots and socks, the other who was telling me we forgot his coat in grandma's cart, I was telling them how we don't behave when we're at Sam's Club. That they were acting naughty and not listening and running around and that is not acceptable.

What I really wanted to say was:
"You @#$ &^ kids %$#$% drove &^%$%^ me & %#$%^ bananas!!!!"

But, I'm a mature, responsible I just said that in my head.

Then...ugh...then, I was picking Baby Girl up to put her in her car seat, when she reached up to brush the hair from her eyes or something, and we had a "Fingernail vs. Cornea" moment.

The fingernail won.

So, here it was, after 4 o'clock on a Friday night, my eye was watering like Niagara Falls, my stress level was out of control, and I couldn't keep my eye open.

I called the eye doctor and was told to go right there. Called my husband (his response deserves it's own post...) to tell him to meet me at the eye clinic so he could take the kids...called the day care lady to tell her I wouldn't be there as soon as I thought to gather my older kids...called my mom to tell her I was quite certain there was something wrong with my eye because I could feel "a flap of something" when I blinked.

Then, on the way home, with one eye tightly closed (PS--have you ever driven with one eye closed? Er...yeah...good bye depth perception...) and expired tabs on my van (yes, again!!) I glanced in my review mirror and saw a State Trooper behind me.


*cue fighting tears*

Thankfully, he passed right by me...I was quite certain that had I gotten pulled over, I would've dissolved into a puddle of tears...which I am equally quite certain he wouldn't have been impressed with.

So...finally got to the eye doctor...where I was declared to have a "sizeable corneal abrasion" (she scraped a chunk clear off), received a "lens bandage", given a multitude of drops and instructions, and sent on my merry little way.

Gosh...and I really liked that part of my cornea.

"I took my kids Christmas shopping and all I got was this stupid corneal abrasion."

(It's a good thing I had that exciting news to keep me going!! Stay tuned! Next post up will be that one!) ;)


  1. ugh! I'm so sorry about your eye! Hope it heals up quickly.

  2. Ouch! Hope you are doing better! I fully understand the "mature" language in your head! :) Merry Christmas!

  3. Sounds like a shopping trip from Hell! Hope your eye feels better soon!

  4. Oh my goodness! That definitely would make for a very terrible day! I am glad they were able to fix your eye and I hope it gets to feeling better very soon.

  5. Oh no. A. had one of those from his classmate two years ago. The Dr. said that those are horribly painful! His went all the way across his eye....yuck. The nice thing is that the eyeis one of the fastest healing parts of the body! At least you had good hair, right?

  6. Oh ow!!! So very sorry! What a night indeed. Praying for you eye to heal quickly and without infection. And boy, am I amazed at you and how "mature" you kept things. I think the "inside voice" thoughts would be flowing right out of my mouth in that moment!

    Well, off to take care of my stomach-flu kids...

  7. Oh no! I'm so sorry! That sounds horrific! I uh, didn't mean to, but I was laughing at the Sam's Club part... because my kids do that nonsense occasionally and it pisses me off to an equal extent... and then I read about the eyeball and felt reeeeeeeeeeally guilty for laughing. Sista, you deserve a break - milk the broken eye for all it's worth and take a nap!

  8. Oh good gracious! Ask Santa for a really great gift befitting a lacerated cornea and frazzled nerves.

  9. Oh my gosh...what a horrific story! I hope your eye is feeling better!

  10. Owie! Owie! Owie! I once had a kitten scratch my cornea so I totally feel your pain.

    And on a side note, my tags are expired too. Just how it goes sometimes.

  11. haha you crack me up: "but I'm a mature responsible adult, so I just said it in my head."

    haha I've been there too many times

  12. Mouthy accidentally (really!) gave a corneal abrasion to Punk when he was little. It did not end well. Think 1.5 yr old vs ER dr with blue dye thing to lay on his eye. Hope it feels better soon.

  13. It just never fails huh? You think you'll go get a little bit done and then opps! Hope your eye feels better quickly, I know how bad that can hurt! And I loved everything you said it your head aren't you glad no one else is in there when we start using those words.

  14. So glad I'm not the only one with kids that go bananas in the store and drive me nuts. It was fun reading your blog :)


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