My Little Life

One year ago, around midnight last night, my babe was wheeled out of surgery and her surgeon confirmed that she was, indeed, a sick little girl with a nasty old appendix inside of her. Well, actually, he had just taken out that nasty old appendix. Wow...that was a long week. Now that we're a year removed from it, it sort of feels "surreal" too. I read back through all of those posts and find it, simultaneously, hard to believe it ever really happened and feeling like it was just yesterday that it happened. I realized that I neglected to tell you a funny story about the night of her surgery . We had been settled on the Pediatric floor, I had fallen into that sort of "sleeping with one eye open" kind of sleep when I realized the nurse was in our room I woke up, kissed my Belle and discovered she was burning up. The nurse confirmed that she had just checked her temp and was getting some Tylenol to treat her fever. Belle was starting to stir, so I quietly got close ...

60 minute use of an operating room: $10,687.00. Eight day "room and board" for a hospital room: $14,976.00. 9 "pokes" by the lab: $2,200.00. Knowing my little girl is healed and healthy : Priceless .

Two weeks ago tonight, I made a decision that turned out to be a very good one. I'll admit, when I decided to take Belle to the ER, I second guessed myself the whole way there. Was I overreacting? Was I going to be "one of those moms"? Is she really as sick as I think she is? Those thoughts were on continuous play through my mind. I am equal parts entirely relieved that I made the decision to go and angry with myself for letting it go on as long as it did. And even angrier because of something else. I made the mistake of googling things associated with appendicitis. "Peritonitis" was the big one I was googling...and mainly because, in the deep recesses of my mind, I am afraid that by me not seeing the signs of Belle's appendicitis, that I may have caused her long term damage. She has some important, and very delicate, parts in the general vicinity of her appendix that she will need later in life to become a mommy...and I was/am so afraid that her infection m...

Just ' cuz I want you to see how good our girl looks: What a beautiful sight! (And, just to reassure you...those braids have been unbraided, washed, and rebraided many times!) I was very hesitant to take Belle to the Wild game on Saturday, but her big brother fought for her cause...told us that she'd be comfortable, not "exposed" to many people, and we could wheel her in via stroller. So, we did. She was VERY happy to get to go (I was originally planning on staying back with her...) and it was great to get together with family! She's been more active, having MUCH less pain (basically getting by on just ibuprofen), eating yogurt like it's going out of style, and even got outside for a bit yesterday to watch her daddy burn our field: Still needs to gain some weight back, and work on her energy levels, but we're doing very well! Today marks the first day back to school for her in over 2 weeks (thankfully they were on spring break for part of the time she mi...

One week. Wednesday to Wednesday. That's usually how long people go on vacation. To an exotic locale to sip fruity drinks on the beach and get tan and relax and feel the breeze in their hair and the spray of the ocean on their faces. One week. I'd never been away from my kids for that long before. Yeah...I'd rather have been in Tahiti. Instead, I was sitting by my 2 nd born's hospital bed, worrying like crazy and trying to subdue the nurse in me. The nurse in me who's heard horror stories of ruptured appendixes and taken care of kids very ill after their appendix had ruptured. Yeah, the mom in me put the nurse in me in a choke hold and wouldn't let her come out. I just. couldn't. go there. In reality, my Belle was never gravely ill (says the mom in me...while the nurse in me wants to remind her of a story a doctor once told her and the risks that come with a ruptured appendix...). She was miserable. Feverish. In pain. But, never critical. THANK GOD!! I lo...

It is official, my friends! We get to go home today! Pain control is MUCH better since we made a little tweak yesterday. The nurse talked with the peds pharmacist and let him know that she wasn't getting adequate pain coverage (I was, slightly, concerned that she was still having enough pain to require narcotics...but we need to keep her comfy.) with what she was on...so they increased the dose of her Percocet to one full pill every 6 hrs vs. 1/2 pill every 4 hours. Just what we needed...well, that and a little something else... After talking with one of the nurses up here, I decided to ask for a pediatrician consult yesterday. Best move ever. I have been very pleased with the care our surgeon has been giving us, but why not have two minds looking over her, right? Well, the pediatrician that happened to be on was a female (I don't think this would've been caught with a male)...AND, she discovered that poor Belle had a little something going on that girls get when they...

Yet. Doctor was in, Belle's labs look better, her temps are normal...but because of the under-dosing of her antibiotics, he wants her to stay for 24 more hours of appropriately dosed antibiotics. She's having a little more pain as we try to navigate how to decrease her use of narcotics, but still keep her comfy. It's so hard seeing my girl in pain, and I just wish I could take this away for her. It is unfair to see your baby suffering. We're going to try giving her an alternating schedule of ibuprofen/ Percocet ...so that she'll get one or the other every three hours. Hopefully, this will be the ticket! I'm trying to talk her into a bath...so far, it's a no go. Yesterday AND today, the therapy dog came and visited with her...which SHE loved, and I cringed, when I saw all the dog hair left on her bed. Grody . Belle's spirit's seem to be good...between you and me, I kinda think she's enjoying all the attention! Me, however? I'm ready to get out...

I meant to update before 9:30 pm, but somehow, I just ran out of time! My Belle had a wonderful day today! She got a little spunk back, seemed less irritated with people, more like herself, started eating more, drinking more, had her IV rate turned down, is requiring less pain meds , and, ( shhhh ...don't tell her I told you) she had a "more normal" poop! She has been smiley and talkative most of the day, and her "spark" is back in her eyes! I'm keeping my fingers crossed for discharge tomorrow, but we'll have to wait out her morning labs. They are drawing a CRP (inflammation test), as it hasn't changed and we should be seeing it decline by this point, and a white blood cell count. Her temps today have been good...however, we've also kept her medicated, so we're going to try to wait out her pain meds until 10:30 ish tonight (unless, of course, she needs them by then) to see if she spikes a fever. This afternoon they made a small change to ...

Last night, as I lay in a darkened hospital room (waiting for my Benadryl to kick in...hey, it's all about survival...) listening to the click and whir of an IV pump and the continuous blowing from the ventilation (in addition to some clanging and banging)...I started thinking about the past week. It struck me, how things "work out"... My parents, who have been keeping our other kids this whole time, were supposed to be in Arizona last week. Then, my dad's partner decided it would be fun to mistakenly swap his heart pills for his sleeping pills, and ended up being admitted to the hospital for some testing (only to figure out his mistake as they were packing up his pills to go to the Mayo Clinic--oops...). Because of his "mysterious symptoms" (hey, YOU try taking Ambien right after you wake up in the morning...), my parent's canceled their Arizona trip. And, because they canceled their Arizona trip, they were able to be there for us and step right in to...

Well, just as I was posting last night's update , our girl spiked a fever...and when she spikes, she totally looks puny. Wiped out, pale, glossy eyed. So, I asked that the doctor be updated, he was and ordered a lab that I took as a "brush off"...I felt like he was just placating us with something because he didn't want to make any decisions that night. Turns out, after talking at length with today's doctor, that it really is too early to tell. That it isn't entirely abnormal to run fevers after a perforated appendix (which they are now considering hers to be). He told us they need to weigh the risks of exposing a child to radiation with the benefit of doing a CT scan when it's really to soon to tell if there would be an abscess forming in there. Made me feel better to have some reasoning behind all of this. And to know that we weren't getting a brush off last night. I also wanted to know what our "criteria" was for discharge...as I'd ...

Today, we had some progress... My girl. In a chair. For a couple of hours. We're up to three walks today, already. She actually ate a small amount of lunch and drank more than a few sips of fluids. Her temps have been more normal, though, as is fairly typical with kids, as we're getting toward evening, it's creeping back up again. The doc that saw us today, gave me a bit more insight into why they're taking it so slow with our girl...although there was nothing "spilling" from her sickened appendix when they removed it, her insides told them something different. I read the op note today that said: "Acute appendicitis. Peritonitis. Suspect contained perforation." I was informed (by yet ANOTHER incredible surgeon) that she is at very high risk of developing an abscess because of "how contaminated her abdominal cavity was". Yikes. Hoping for discharge tomorrow. But only if she's ready. Currently, she's on her 2nd nap of the day. Clearly...

But only just a little. I awoke this morning to a girl who was lookin ' pretty punk. Queasy, quiet, and her ever present stoicism. In my eyes, a step backward from yesterday. On the inside, I worried. I fretted...but on the outside, I tried my best to play cheerleader. Encouraging trips to the bathroom, a walk in the halls, and breakfast. The first two I was successful at, the last? Not so much. Girl doesn't want to even think about food. Getting her drink takes some major encouragement! I stepped out in the hall for some ice while the nurse assessed my babe's belly. Then, I stopped her (the nurse) in the hall to talk, and ended up teary eyed. It's just so hard to see one of my babies hurting. We decided to try some pain meds , even though Belle's been saying she doesn't need anything, and we ended up seeing our girl perk up a bit! The nurse in me comes out too much, and I've been afraid of giving her narcotics because I don't want to slow down her alrea...

Sigh. Where do I start? Oh, I know...how about where I left off yesterday ... Strep, negative...I was then convinced we were dealing with influenza. Even tho she had abdominal pain. The abdominal pain was kind of a head scratcher , but I thought, "huh, must just be part of it". By Wednesday afternoon, the lightbulb began to go on. It started out kinda dim, tho, so I kept shutting it off. At about 4 o'clock, I could no longer ignore the glaring light in front of my eyes... Abdominal pain that had her moaning, the way she walked hunched over, the fevers, the nausea, the lack of appetite...it was all adding up. I finally asked her, if she had to point to ONE specific spot where it hurt, where would she point. She had been generalizing her pain to the very lower part of her abdomen, but when I asked her to specify... Her finger when right to the spot I was dreading...the right lower corner of her tummy. *Gulp* And, at 4 o'clock, you're hard pressed to find an appoint...