Dearest self:
This is your body speakin'. I've been thinkin', and I'm ready to accept your apology.
I realize that what you are doing to me with this whole (*raises fingers in air...gives "air quote" symbol*) "KettleWorx" deal is for my own good.
But sista'...I've gotta level with you...
This:
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Ain't neva' gonna happen.
HA!! Talk about wishful thinking!
And, don't even think about asking Santa to bring you a "Giselle-like" body. He'd laugh so hard he might pee his pants. And pee'd on pants + below freezing temps = a miserable night for the big guy.
Please, give him a break, and just don't ask.
'kay?
Alrighty then!
Love ya! Muah!
Respectfully yours,
Your Bod
This is your body speakin'. I've been thinkin', and I'm ready to accept your apology.
I realize that what you are doing to me with this whole (*raises fingers in air...gives "air quote" symbol*) "KettleWorx" deal is for my own good.
But sista'...I've gotta level with you...
This:

Ain't neva' gonna happen.
HA!! Talk about wishful thinking!
And, don't even think about asking Santa to bring you a "Giselle-like" body. He'd laugh so hard he might pee his pants. And pee'd on pants + below freezing temps = a miserable night for the big guy.
Please, give him a break, and just don't ask.
'kay?
Alrighty then!
Love ya! Muah!
Respectfully yours,
Your Bod
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Our bodies can be just plain mean can't they! Talk about shooting down hopes and dreams!
ReplyDeleteHope your body recovers!
Hey, we can always dream can't we? I find myself wishing the same things, and my body just isn't cooperating. Oh well...none of these women have probably ever had children either. And I prefer to eat food rather than just drink protein shakes. :)
ReplyDeleteI have to keep telling myself that the airbrushed look is SO 1990...and that it won't ever happen to me!
ReplyDelete~WM
You're hilarious! I think you look phenomenal :)
ReplyDeleteLove your post,
ReplyDeleteI would love Catherine Zeta Jones' body, but that means I would have to get a personal trainer and eat rice cakes all day.... that would never happen.
Karen
So, I'm a bit behind on my blog reading, but I was so excited to see the post below! That's so cool that you got to meet Mckmama! Do you live close to her? I wanted to go on the Mckcruise in January, but then I got pregnant and things just didn't work out (not that I'm complaining!) I wish I lived close enough to attend one of her gatherings! So happy you shared the pictures!
ReplyDeleteI'm going to start working towards that Giselle body 01-01-10! P90x in full throttle! But I think giselle is still a little to far from reality - but hey I can dream right? Haha
ReplyDeletePs. Great post! It had me laughing out loud!
Haha- if it makes you feel any better, she is officially one of US right now- I'd love to see what Gisele looks like post-partum (actually, I wouldn't...it would probably be way better than how I look anyways;).
ReplyDeleteO dear Lord, I think I just peed my pants laughing at this post! Hilarious!
ReplyDeleteI think I have resigned myself to know that my body will never look like that - again....
Le sigh!
Naah! let your body read "the secret" ;-)
ReplyDeleteLove this.
ReplyDeleteMy body would agree *gg*