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Here's the Dealio...

In the past week I've worked out twice.

Two times.



And, you know what? I don't look like Giselle Bundchen yet.

I mean, WTH?! The universe must be playing games with me because I totally FEEL like I should look like Giselle, yet, when I look in the mirror all I see is a 30 something mother of five (with the battle wounds to show for it) with a strong penchant for Doritos and Sour Patch Kids staring back at me.

Here's the other thing. I hurt.

And, I'm not so sure it's in a good way...but it could be. All I know is those damn "front plank holds" totally kicked my ass when all I thought I was doing was kicking their ass. Sure, my legs, arms, back, belly, and butt were quivering with fatigue and waving their white flags but I'D BE DAMNED if I was going to let that front plank win!!

So, I held it. I quivered. I swore. I tried not to hold my breath. And when it was over, I collapsed (all 4 inches) to the ground and tried to talk myself into how great that felt. And wasn't I proud of myself?! And "just think mama!! You'll look in the mirror and see the body of a 25 year old supermodel!!"

Yeah. No.

Someone, quick. Get me some Bengay. Or some IcyHot. And a good masseuse. A bottle of ibuprofen. A hot pack. Oh, and chiropractor.


All my love,
Your Loveable Achy Old Friend,


  1. I feel your pain about being a 30 something mother and trying to get fit, I think I torn something in my knee and am having an MRI next week.

  2. I swear if someone shot a youtube video of me trying to get my pre-baby(s) pants on it would have a million hits. Work outs lately have just served as a reminder to how totally out of shape I am. In my head I should totally be able to reach my toes...WTF?

  3. LOL!!! Funny.. at least you try to exercise. I have no energy for that!!

  4. I've only had one baby and if I had your bod I'd quit working out ;) Best wishes with your planking endeavors!

  5. Two times is better than zero times! Yay you!

  6. I LOVE Sour Patch Kids too! Screw working out...this 45 year old Mom of two can only managing walk the mutts. I think a Plank would kill me at this point and really no matter how many planks I do... Playboy is not calling...Now, where did I put those sour patch kids!

  7. Ummmm... Seriously jealous of you... your mother of five looks much different (read:BETTER) than my mother of five kiddos, lol! Giselle has nothing on you! Put those tapes away and get your little tushie out running with me : )


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