Monday, May 21, 2012

Talking about "firsts"...it doesn't have to be difficult!


My big girl is growing up. It kinda makes my mama's heart a little sad, as I see a teeny bit of her "kid-ness" disappear each day (although, trust me, there is still PLENTY of kid there!). I love watching my kids grow up, but as they grow, it brings up a multitude of conversations to be had!

Birds and the bees, boyfriend/girlfriend issues, friend debacles, Santa Claus/Easter Bunny/Tooth Fairy conversations, and one I vividly remember having with my mom--shaving my legs.

Seriously, I can remember it like it was yesterday...

I was going into 6th grade, I had hairy legs, and I was sooooooooo wanting to be grown up enough to shave. My pitch? "Girls wear skirts a lot more in middle school. I need (yes, it was a need) to shave my legs 'cuz I'll be wearing more skirts." It worked! My mom went and bought me supplies to start shaving my legs!

BlogHer and Venus provided me the opportunity to really start thinking about this impending conversation with Belle that is likely to happen before I know it!


While Belle hasn't asked yet, I know those conversations are not all that far away. I always strive to have an open and honest relationship with my kids when it comes to more "sensitive" subjects; I want them to come to ME for their information, not to hear it at school or on the bus or from a friend.

I truly believe in answering questions as fully and honestly as possible with my kids. I never want them to feel they can't talk to me about something, even something as "easy" as conversations about shaving their legs! (Or shaving their faces; we crossed that bridge with the Pal a couple of years ago!)

While I think that Belle is currently "too young" to shave her legs, I invite discussion with her as often as I can about many subjects.

I take "real life" situations to turn conversations into organic discussions. Sometimes I think a lot of "discussion anxiety" (for kids AND parents) comes from the idea that you have to sit your child down and have the stern "Son, we need to talk" kind of speeches.

I have discovered that it is SO much easier and conversations seem so much more real and less "scary" when you can take everyday discussions and turn them into learning experiences.

The next time Belle asks about me shaving my legs or why I use shaving cream or "Does it hurt when you shave?" I fully intend to answer her questions honestly, then gently bring up something along the lines of, "Some day you'll shave your legs too. Do any girls shave their legs yet at school? I think you're currently too young, but someday soon I know you'll want to start shaving and when you and I both determine that you're old enough, I will show you how and teach you so that you don't hurt yourself."

Probably not those exact words, but along those lines of "conversation flow"!

We'll talk about how to shave, how using shaving cream and a good razor like the Venus Embrace helps to reduce nicks and cuts with its 5 blades and a Ribbon of Moisture for a smooth shave, and how sometimes, it's just a little more fun to use a girly product, like Satin Care Passionista Fruit, that smells sooooooo good, instead of the manly shaving cream that we always seem to have around!

Hey, a girl's gotta embrace her girliness!

If you have a first-time shaver in your home, you should check out some of these great tips from Venus Embrace!

So, wanna chance to win a $50 Visa gift card? It's super easy...just leave me a comment sharing a tip for tackling tough "firsts" with your kids, and you're entered for a chance to win! Easy peasy lemon squeezy!

Rules:
No duplicate comments. You may receive (2) total entries by selecting from the following entry methods:
a) Leave a comment in response to the sweepstakes prompt on this post
b) Tweet about this promotion and leave the URL to that tweet in a comment on this post
c) Blog about this promotion and leave the URL to that post in a comment on this post
d) For those with no Twitter or blog, read the official rules to learn about an alternate form of entry. This giveaway is open to US Residents age 18 or older. Winners will be selected via random draw, and will be notified by e-mail. You have 72 hours to get back to me, otherwise a new winner will be selected.
The Official Rules are available here.
This sweepstakes runs from 5/21 - 6/30.
Be sure to visit the Venus Brand feature page on BlogHer.com where you can read other bloggers’ reviews and find more chances to win!

74 comments:

  1. Talk slowly and just answer the questions they ask without elaborating. They really just want to know that you have things under control and life is safe!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Keep an open line of discussion - be honest!

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  3. I agree that keeping an open line of communication and being honest are the keys to those "first" talks. We've talked to our kids openly about drugs, alcohol, sex, and more ever since they could talk. Of course, it was on their level and appropriate for the situation, but as they are growing these subjects aren't new. It's easier than just now trying to bring them up.

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  4. I always want to be honest with my children. Growing up, I had to learn some things on my own and still feel a sense of loss about it. I want my children to know that they can come to me with anything without feeling like they'll be reprimanded or talked down upon. Thanks for the post :) Isn't being a mommy just GREAT!!

    Nichole Smith
    covergirl88wwjd@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hey, not exactly sure how to find the url to my tweet but, here's the url to my page! I hope it still counts :)

    https://twitter.com/#!/NeecoleSmithy

    Nichole Smith
    covergirl88wwjd@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  6. Just being supportive and encouraging communication, is the best policy to conquer any growing up milestone.

    ReplyDelete
  7. tweet
    https://twitter.com/#!/rosorior/status/204614630465744896
    roso1946@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  8. Our son is only 13 months old, but I've already been dreading those scary per-teen and teenage years. Hopefilly since he's a boy,my husband will be the one he wants to deal with those things. But, like you said I would like to have the kind of relationship where he wants to come to me.

    ReplyDelete
  9. My daughter is too young still (she’s 2) but I remember my mom reading “Where do I come from?” with me to teach me about the facts of life.

    mami2jcn at gmail dot com

    ReplyDelete
  10. tweet:

    https://twitter.com/#!/mami2jcn/status/204617517149331457

    mami2jcn at gmail dot com

    ReplyDelete
  11. i think it's important not to ignore these quesstions and to be open and honest with your kids.

    elena150980@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  12. https://twitter.com/#!/ElenaIstomina/status/204627676466642945

    elena150980@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  13. Be open and don't talk down to them. Don't assume that they won't know what you're talking about. Use grown up terminology ... if you baby talk them, they'll think there's something to be embarrassed about :)

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  14. my daughter is only 4 mos old but when gets older im going to teach her to be honest and to be happy !

    freebiel0ve@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  15. https://twitter.com/#!/akronugurl/status/204642920857485312

    freebiel0ve@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  16. just be straight-forward, honest, and keep a sense of humor when talking with your kids
    thepryfamily@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  17. https://twitter.com/#!/thepryfamily2/status/204727362288500736

    thepryfamily@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  18. My daughter is only 4, but I keep my explanations simple and always remind her how pretty and smart she is!

    kellywcuATyahooDOTcom

    ReplyDelete
  19. tweeted
    https://twitter.com/kellydsaver/status/204733398718222336

    kellywcuATyahooDOTcom

    ReplyDelete
  20. make sure you talk WITH them not AT them.. and listen!

    vanitizebaby at yahoo dot com

    ReplyDelete
  21. tweet

    https://twitter.com/#!/MeandBells/status/204764491878109184

    vanitizebaby at yahoo dot com

    ReplyDelete
  22. My kids are still to young to know. but I think about it.I want to have a good clam relaxed conversation and let me ask questions as well.

    ReplyDelete
  23. tweet. amypugmire@live.com
    https://twitter.com/#!/1amypugmire/status/204775613725294593

    ReplyDelete
  24. I think having on going conversations about anything and everything is important. Let your kids know they can talk about anything with you. Be honest and encourage them to talk to you.

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  25. I don't have any teenage girls--just a boy, but I think it is good to be interested in their lives and be willing to make time for them... Thanks for a chance to win and have a great day!
    kmassmanATgmailDOTcom

    ReplyDelete
  26. It is certainly not easy to be a parent, especially tackling those tough “first” conversations with my kids. But the best way I prefer is openness and be honest and straight forward. That’s the way I preferred to be treated, so, I’ll do the same with my kids.

    Amy [at] utry [dot] it

    ReplyDelete
  27. tweeted:
    https://twitter.com/uTry_it/status/205948967698186240

    Amy [at] utry [dot] it

    ReplyDelete
  28. Just being honest. It's the best approach most of the time!

    --Brandy
    fosterbrandy(at)msn(dot)com

    ReplyDelete
  29. I think if you have a good relationship with your kids as they're growing up, all important conversations will come much more naturally.
    thismomwins@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  30. I tweeted: https://twitter.com/thismomwins2/status/206470132313227265
    thismomwins@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  31. Being honest and being a good listener is the best way.

    rhoneygtn at yahoo dot com

    ReplyDelete
  32. Be honest and realistic are best tips from my experience.
    tcarolinep at gmail dot com

    ReplyDelete
  33. https://twitter.com/tcarolinep/status/206961970769969152

    ReplyDelete
  34. Ahhh, I have no idea, we haven't had to go through any yet! But I think it is important to be very honest and open with them. :)

    ReplyDelete
  35. I would say to be patient and understanding. Share with them a personal childhood/teenage memory of your own!

    pokergrl8 at gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  36. https://twitter.com/aes529/status/208957671116779521

    pokergrl8 at gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  37. My daughter is too young. I'm going to teach her just be herself and honest
    merleandtina@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  38. https://twitter.com/HappyTina0115/status/210036534626369536
    merleandtina@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  39. answer questions and be open and honest! give them truth or the world will give their version of truth! Thanks for a super giveaway!
    My email: anashct1 [at] yahoo [dot] com

    ReplyDelete
  40. Tweeted:
    https://twitter.com/anashct3/status/210680154220019712
    Thanks for the chance to win!
    email: anashct1 [at] yahoo [dot] com

    ReplyDelete
  41. Make them feel comfortable by expressing that they can come to you later, anytime, with questions. Don't let them feel like it's a one time discussion where they have to ask now or forever hold their peace.

    ReplyDelete
  42. I tweeted
    https://twitter.com/tracylr233/status/210820906753339392

    ReplyDelete
  43. tweet
    http://twitter.com/tnshadylady/status/211817502123114497

    ReplyDelete
  44. blog post
    http://tnshadylady.blogspot.com/2012/06/more-great-bloghercom-giveaways.html

    ReplyDelete
  45. i plan to do it over a meal so we can both think while we chew! scg00387 at yahoo dot com

    ReplyDelete
  46. https://twitter.com/DesMoinesDealin/status/211880024377274368 scg00387 at yahoo dot com

    ReplyDelete
  47. My tip is to be calm and treat your child with respect; treating them like an adult will allow them the choice of starting to act like an adult.
    geminicalli at yahoo dot com

    ReplyDelete
  48. My daughter is only (almost) two, so we haven't had those big conversations yet, but when we do, I hope to be honest and listen well.

    chambanachik@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  49. just try to be open and honest about everything so it doesn't feel awkward or embarassing....instead it is just part of life.
    cgies25 at homtail

    ReplyDelete
  50. Tackling tough “firsts” with my kids is not easy, but I would have the conversation personally with him/her honestly and share my past experience, he/she would be interested to listen and learn.

    ctong2[at]gmail[dot]com

    ReplyDelete
  51. I tweeted about this promotion: https://twitter.com/ctong2/status/213903024911958016

    ctong2[at]gmail[dot]com

    ReplyDelete
  52. tweet: https://twitter.com/syytta/status/214273996605243392
    songyueyu at gmail

    ReplyDelete
  53. things like shaving are simply a fact of life - just be open and honest - sharing a mother -daughter day helps too!

    debbiebellows (at) gmail (dot) com

    ReplyDelete
  54. i tweeted here:

    https://twitter.com/bellows22/status/214899271416283137

    debbiebellows (at) gmail (dot) com

    ReplyDelete
  55. my daughter is still a baby so I haven't had to have any "talks" with her yet

    karinaroselee at gmail dot com

    ReplyDelete
  56. https://twitter.com/karinaroselee/status/215195021958324224

    karinaroselee at gmail dot com

    ReplyDelete
  57. My daughter was pretty easy - just try not to be uptight (I was on occasion) and it's much easier :)
    bingomamanorma(at)gmail(dot)com

    ReplyDelete
  58. I don't have ids, but as a child I appreciated Mom being honest and available
    adrianecoros(at)gmail(dot)com

    ReplyDelete
  59. https://twitter.com/LAMusing/status/215596538179747840
    adrianecoros(at)gmail(dot)com

    ReplyDelete
  60. tweet-https://twitter.com/CrazyItalian0/status/217309217579732992
    gina.m.maddox (at) gmail (dot) com

    ReplyDelete
  61. Being open and honest is the best method. Start early and talk about everything and when the tough subjects come up they won't be so difficult.

    willitara [at] gmail [dot] com

    ReplyDelete
  62. I am just honest with my daughter about everything we talk about.
    MCantu1019 at aol dot com

    ReplyDelete
  63. When we have one of those 'firsts conversations', I just make sure my kids know that they can ask me any questions.
    nuthouse(at)centurytel(dot)net

    ReplyDelete
  64. tweeted: https://twitter.com/KerryBishop/status/218489461745528833

    ReplyDelete
  65. Tweet: http://twitter.com/coriwestphal/statuses/218546910577954816

    coriwestphal at msn dot com

    ReplyDelete
  66. Tweet - https://twitter.com/willitara/status/218724160682209281

    willitara [at] gmail [dot] com

    ReplyDelete
  67. Well, I talked to her about getting period and how to notice the signs and asked her if she wanted to start shaving when she notices hair on her legs (she has two older sisters who do)
    tbarrettno1 at gmail dot com

    ReplyDelete
  68. tweet
    https://twitter.com/ChelleB36/status/218726506908745728
    tbarrettno1 at gmail dot com

    ReplyDelete
  69. Be open, we are very open with our daughter so these talks are not bad. sweepmorey at gmail dot com

    ReplyDelete
  70. tweeted https://twitter.com/mommysdizzy/status/218832788990853120

    ReplyDelete
  71. My best tip is to approach the conversation and answer only the questions your child has at the time - don't overwhelm them with information they may not be ready to deal with.

    ReplyDelete
  72. 1st...love the "Easy peasy lemon squeezy!" line...hilarious! LOL That said, I don't have any kids but my mom was always awesome at handling any 1st that came her way from me. She had this rule: if you are old enough to ask, you are old enough to know. When I was 5, I asked her what the F word meant and thus that ball started rolling! Some parents may be scared to be that honest with their kids, but its worth it, trust me! When I was a teen, I went to her for EVERYTHING and NEVER found myself in a stick situation because I was informed and knew what was what!
    Angie
    14earth at gmail dot com

    ReplyDelete
  73. I tweeted here: https://twitter.com/MsTofuFairy/status/219060522102960129
    Angie
    14earth at gmail dot com

    ReplyDelete
  74. My daughter is a teenager...quite honestly I was "nervous" about tough
    first conversation...took the plunge and found she wanted to know things..this helped ..I believe being honest is helpful
    thanks
    aunteegem@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete

I love comments! And, I welcome your thoughts that aren't in agreement with mine...as long as they are respectful!

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