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Gluttony...


It's my middle name.

That's right...all this time, you thought I was just "Mama M.", no middle name, right? Well, I'm sorry to inform you that you were wrong.

Yes, my name is "Mama Gluttony M."...and I have the love handles and fluffy gut to prove it. As well as the indigestion. *burp*

(Courtesy Google Image, although I'm not sure how they got this image of me...)

It started with Christmas. No, scratch that...it started with Thanksgiving, slowly snowballing into this monster of a beast that has my stomach revolting in sooooo many ways. Trust me...YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW.

Just when I've stuffed myself full of thirds and fourths from supper, I loosen my pants, wipe my mouth, declare myself stuffed, clear my plate and head straight for the pantry to see what we have in there.

It's a sickness...remember the heart attack I had a few weeks ago? Yeah, it keeps happening! However, now, instead of freaking out and drawing up a will...I just burp, which opens up some space in my tummy, which I can fill up with more yummy food.

Heaven help me. I need someone to save me from my gluttony!! If I don't get help soon...I'm going to explode...and it ain't gonna be pretty.

*burp*

Comments

  1. VanessaJanuary 4, 2011 at 8:04 AM

    I'm the same way! I'm half convinced that I'm pregnant I'm eating so much! It's all so yummy! And did you know that it doesn't matter how full you are, you can always have ice cream? Because it melts and fills in the cracks!

    ReplyDelete
  2. The Regal PupJanuary 4, 2011 at 8:25 AM

    You and me both! Except mine started with Halloween and all the candy! :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. SandyJanuary 4, 2011 at 11:29 AM

    Ugh. I'm on day two of sugar detox. I'm a tad cranky. JUST A TAD!!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. TheFitHousewifeJanuary 4, 2011 at 11:49 AM

    I hear ya! I have a little "gas baby" at the end of the day...make that BIG gas baby.

    ReplyDelete
  5. JillJanuary 4, 2011 at 12:20 PM

    Me too sista! One of my facebook status updates on Christmas Eve was "Let the gluttony begin!" I actually counted calories & ate a salad yesterday - I am running out of pants that still fit!

    ReplyDelete
  6. NelJanuary 4, 2011 at 1:23 PM

    Speaking of Gluttony - we THOROUGHLY enjoyed your Mexican Tator Tot Hotdish! Kids, hubby and in-laws!

    Thanks for sharing.

    ReplyDelete
  7. KarrieJanuary 4, 2011 at 1:56 PM

    LOL!!!!!!!!!!! I am not laughing at your terribly uncomfortable position, but your way with words always cracks me up!

    Hope you get it squared away before you explode, but it definitely sounds like some good "burping" wars are in order!!! I bet you could win some money with your heart attack burps!

    ReplyDelete
  8. KateJanuary 4, 2011 at 9:03 PM

    Cute post! Is the blonde natural? I don't see any roots in the pic hehe

    ReplyDelete

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