I've always been the bill payer 'round here. My hubby...well, he's what you'd call a little "relaxed" when it comes to paying bills.
Drove me INSANE when we were first married, so, I did what any newlywed would do...I confiscated the checkbook and wouldn't let him near it. Once, when I thought I sent our student loan bill off in the mail, I found it, weeks later, buried under a stash of papers.
I freaked. Hyperventilated. Went into shock. Had a heart attack, then brought myself back to life and called the company...tail between my legs. They were totally understanding, told me that they don't "report late payments until it's been a few months"...so we were fine. I sent the check, then told my husband what happened.
His response? "Well, gosh! I wouldn't send it out 'til the last minute then!!" *shakes head...clucks tongue...rubs temples* See what I had to deal with?
I couldn't stand the thought of not paying the bills on time. Gives me hives just thinking about it...*shudder*.
Well, he's become a lot more...shall we say "responsible" in the almost 10 years and 5 kids since then. Me? I've become more of a freak.
Friends, I am a financial freak.
As in, I freak if the financial situation is anything but peachy.
I've been freakin' lately.
So, I did what any veteran married woman (wait, can I call myself a marriage vet at this point, yet?!) would do. I threw up my hands, brushed them off and said, "I'm done. My psyche can no longer handle the checkbook." I pushed my chair away from the counter, and haven't looked back.
One too many tears of stress shed ('course, they were shed during my near mental breakdown...wonder if I could handle it more now?!)...and I was done.
D. O. N. E.
Done.
It's blissful. Glorious. Dreamy.
Only...I can't quite let go of those early memories of marriage...I keep asking, "Have you paid the bills?" "Hon, did you get the bills paid?" "Hottie, do you see those envelopes over there? They need to be filled with a check."
I came home tonight to a stack of neatly stamped and addressed bills on the counter.
Sigh...
I love my husband.
I'm the same way when it comes to bills! I have to pay them as soon as I get them or I freak about the thought of them being late.
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ReplyDeleteI am so jealous! I'm the bill payer here, and I always will be. Stressful as it is, I think it would be more stressful to hand over the reigns.
ReplyDeleteI'm so not the bill payer around home. I gladly gave up that task when we exchanged our vows. I hate writing checks, yes, the actual writing of checks. I had to resume bill paying when my husband deployed and I can't wait to relinquish that task again!
ReplyDeleteIan does all the bill paying here. I just can't take the stress!
ReplyDeleteMy wife and I have been leaving together for 2 years. It was difficult at the beginning to confront each of our relation to money. I am still trying to make her handle it my way.
ReplyDeleteI prefer automatic billing, and always keeping a good amount on my checking account. This way I don't worry about it. When I can't do automatic, I will do it with my bank's bill pay service. Finally for filing papers, the whole family use xambox, this way when any of us come home, we stack our papers in the scanner, and they are already filed.
I used to be the bill payer...when we were first married. I had a similar melt-down about 8 years ago and it's all his. I had to let go of trying to give him my "system" and trust that his was responsible as well :) Now I love that it is taken care of for me...one of the perks of being a marriage veteran!
ReplyDeleteYou sound just like me. I've been contemplating throwing in the proverbial towel and relinquishing finances to the hubby as well. I don't know, though. It's so hard when you know they aren't as fanatical as we are... :-)
ReplyDeleteI gladly handed over the bills (and my pay check) to my DH once we were married. One less stress for me to worry about!
ReplyDeleteI am the same way when it comes to bills, and I lived with my sister who didn't give them a second thought, so I can completely relate! But now I live with my guy, who worries about them even more than I do... what a relief!
ReplyDeleteTag! You're it!
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Thats great that he will take over when its too much for you...Thats what a marriage should be...a team effort. When I was married we woulda been homeless if I wasn't paying attention. LOL...Homeless with a huge TV...he was always trying to live above our means...Hope your feeling less stressed.
ReplyDeleteI was the same way but I gave the job away years ago. He's never been late on a bill that I know about :) I have found the more you trust them with, the more trustworthy they become.
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