Thursday, December 1, 2011

Taking it's toll...

Too many deaths in the past weeks.

First, sweet Jack. Then, one of our kiddo's teachers' sons was killed in a car accident. Shortly after that, a man we knew in passing was killed when he was struck by a car. Add in the wake my husband recently attended for a seasonal employee's sister and, of course, Verd still on our minds daily, it's no wonder the following conversation happened.

It dawned on me that our flight to Mexico for my brother's wedding leaves on Friday the 13th. Seriously, I think I would've chosen the day before or the day after had I realized that, but whatever.

We were talking about plans for the kids and such when we are gone, and suddenly Belle says, quietly, nervously, clearly worried..."But...Mom...a lot of people are dying. I don't want you to."

Makes me weepy. I have reservations about flying as it is, and I'm not looking forward to leaving my kids behind, so that was a tough pill to swallow.

How do I reassure her when she just spoke aloud the very same fears in my own heart? How do I let her know that it's all going to be okay, when she herself sees and feels the hurt and pain of losing people, most of them gone much too soon? How can I promise her nothing will happen, when she's seen that, indeed, many things can happen to people that aren't supposed to?

It makes me want to say, "Forget it. I'll stay home. Have fun, congrats, and best wishes...but my kiddos need me."


  1. I'm with you there. 2011 has been very hard for me, I lost my Grandpa early in the year, followed by a miscarriage, followed by the death of a close friend. I'm hoping that 2012 will bring me more joy and less heart break and devestation. You can't live your life with "what ifs", you have to take the opportunities and sometimes they come with risks. Explain this to Belle, although it's been a hard year it will get better. All your family and friends are in my thoughts xx

  2. I'm so sorry for all those losses you are experiencing. We once lost 3 people in one week. It is brutal. I've said a prayer for your family.

  3. I am so sorry. Unfortunately, we have had 3 deaths lately also :( What is going on? It's just not fair. Big hugs!!

  4. That sounds like a really rough couple of weeks. I am so sorry for all the loss. Sounds like you need the trip! Go have fun and just reassure your kids that everything will be okay, and that life is to short to fear the unknown. Praying for you all!

  5. I am so sorry, Mama M. I am flying out today & am a little nervous. I don't remember ever being nervous about a flight before. But just so many people (even that i don't know very well) are dying all the time. It is scary.

    But I believe everything will be fine on my flight. And you too! I am not sure what to say to Bella. You are much more experienced at motherhood than I! But I will be praying God comforts her heart and gives both of you peace. HUGS!


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